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soufflesandbowties:

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

(via collapsed)

Saturday, July 26 with 179,913 notes

exhistur:

I wonder if anyone ever looks at me while I’m doing something and thinks I’m pretty. Because I do that all the time to people. 

(via theoppositeofcliche)

Saturday, July 26 with 1,065,050 notes
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I want to do this with someone! Now pleasee!

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(via breakfast-with-satan)

Wednesday, July 23 with 399,439 notes
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me: but it's 2 AM
stomach: did i fucking stutter

Sunday, July 20 with 563,469 notes
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